This second time around I have so much clearer of a vision of would like my birth to be. More freedom, less tubes and wires, more comfort, less sterility.
I want to be able to play the music I want, burn candles, have the lights low, and most importantly , not feel rushed. I want to give birth to my baby the way my body tells me to. Get in a hot tub if I feel like it, and heck maybe even pop the baby out in there.
I want to be able to take a walk, drink some tea, snuggle my boys, lie in my bed, breath at my pace.
Yes, I am aware it is going to hurt. It may take a very long time, and I may have thoughts of "what the hell was I thinking" and attempt to scratch Johns eyeballs out in the process... but I know I can do it, and I know it will be beautiful and, that in the end, I will have no regrets.
I met my midwife for the first time today. Her name is Lynette, she has been the Midwife in over 100 home birth settings, and attended many more than that. I felt so comfortable with her right away, it all just feels so right. I also have an absolutely sweet and helpful Doula named Josie working with me, whom I am excited for John to meet within the next couple weeks.
I had never met a single person who came into my hospital room during Sergei's birth before in my life, including the doctor who delivered him. He and I both had various complications all resulting from unnecessary intervention, and the clincher was really the fact that I did not really even get to hold him for almost an hour after he was born. Kinda heartbreaking, I must say.
Not the welcome I want to give this baby, thats for sure.
As long as all goes as planned, Lynette will be doing home prenatal visits on a regular schedule, until the birth. She will be on call for me and deliver the baby in my home. She will come back for a few weeks following as needed for postnatal care as well.
All home visits!
AND my insurance will cover all but $700 of this. Mindblowing!
I am so grateful and excited that this is all seeming to work out, I feel so lucky and I am completely looking forward to the remainder of this pregnancy and to my second lil' koala's birth.